This Sunday is Mother’s Day. So, here are a few actual conversations I’ve had with my mother.
After telling my mother I no longer wanted to go to school to be an astronaut
Mom: “Sagan, are you building a secret rocket?”
Me: “Like a rocket ship to fly in space?”
Mom: “Yeah, are you building one?”
Me: “No... should I?”
Mom: “Would you tell me if you ever built one?”
Me: “I’m never going to build a rocket ship, Mom.”
Mom: “You’re building a rocket ship aren’t you?”
Me: “Hannah and I are going to a swing competition.”
Mom: “Sagan, you can’t dance. You don’t even have a dance. And I never see you practice.”
Me: “A swing competition is two speech tournaments held on one day in one place.”
Mom: “Stop lying. You can’t dance; I’m not taking you to the mall.”
Me: “It’s for school.”
Mom: “Well take off that pant suit and find a dress you can swing in.”
After telling my mom about a bad dream where I yelled at her
Mom: “I don’t know why you would yell at me.”
Me: “It was a dream.”
Mom: “I would still appreciate an apology.”
Me: “I’m sorry I yelled at you in my dream.”
Mom: “I don’t believe you. Stop coming into my dreams.”
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